Toronto vs Kingston, my dilemma

[guvner]

I'm just looking for some advice here. My wife and are both in our mid/late 20's living in Kingston, we have had plans to sell our house and move to TO for my wife to broaden her career options as a human resources professional and for me to go back to school to become a nurse.

The main issue for going to Toronto is that my wife has many more job opportunities in Toronto (3yrs exp. human resources field), just looking on Workopolis you can see there are lots of jobs available where as smaller Kingston has limited advancement opportunities, infact Workopolis has no job listings. She has a great job where she is now, but wants that option to be able to move onto something bigger and better should something come up and thats where Toronto has the options. Also she is somewhat bored with Kingston which I can understand, its a smaller city and not a lot to do sometimes, but then again any city you live in for awhile can get boring after awhile. For me I plan to quit my job and go back to school so that I can find a more enjoyable career, school wise there are more options in Toronto, but I could careless where I go as long as I can go to school. As for Toronto I am honestly not too fond of moving there, sure I will go if thats best for us, but for me I grew up in a small town outside Montreal so I'm ok with venturing into the big city for trips here and there or to visits friends, but living there is not my cup if tea, in fact I've only been on a city bus once and the subway a half dozen times. Its just so big, fast paced, there are sooooo many people and realistically I'm not sure if I could handle 4 yrs of school there, but I am open minded at the same time.

My dilemma comes from the fact that my wife is dead set of moving there when the time is right, but I don't think we can afford it and I'm doubtfull that I'm going to be happy there in the long run. We will need to live off $45,000 income with a decent 2 bed apartment preferably a house and we have 2 big dogs one being a pitbull mix which worries me too. On paper if we find something say $900/mth and close to the Yonge line where car insurance is cheapest (i'm an insurance broker now) we will be $300 in hole each month so that means I need a part time job while going to school full time. Now in Kingston we could sell our house and downgrade to a small townhouse condo which we used to own and live more comfortably, infact we could rent out a room or the basement and have money in the bank, plus we would slowly build up some equity which we will not when renting in Toronto.

The whole idea with me going to school to pursue my career ambitions is that my wife could persue her career ambitions in Toronto, its suppose to be a win win comprimse for both of us, but she knows I don't want to move since I really like Kingston. Most of our friends and family are here so when I say I don't think we can afford to move to TO she gets upset and it ends up coming across that I'm getting what I want and she just has to follow along, she clearly feels like she is going to be stuck in her job for 4 more years while I get to do what I want and she has to support both of us. I certainly want her to get what she wants, but I really think financially its going to be a big mistake and we have made enough financial mistakes in the past that I'm trying to take the safest and more comfortable route.

I'm feeling like I'm rambling here....any opinions/advice?

 

[nfitz]

... preferably a house and we have 2 big dogs one being a pitbull mix which worries me too. On paper if we find something say $900/mth and close to the Yonge line

I can't imagine you'd find a house for $900 a month anywhere in the city, let alone near the Yonge line! $1,200 maybe ...

The finances really sound shakey to me. With only $45,000 a year, I'd think you'd have to be living like students ... apartment, no car, etc.

 

[guvner]

I was talking 1 floor of a house, but not a high rise apt. With our dogs a high rise would be a PITA.
And we would need to have a car since my wife would be working for her company in Woodbridge and I would be going to school likely at Ryerson or George Brown. No car would be great,it would save us $400/mth, but I know we will need it.
There is always the chance that she could land a job making $55k+, but I don't want to live on chances.

 

[nfitz]

I was talking 1 floor of a house, but not a high rise apt. With our dogs a high rise would be a PITA.

Maybe ... remember that Toronto houses are smaller than Kingston houses ... so one floor is often tiny. Mine is 500 square feet - but on the small side. Maybe you'd find 600-700.

Woodbridge ... you might be better off out in North York or something near the subway - that's a lot of driving.

 

[guvner]

We were thinking Yonge near Finch or Sheppard, the top of the subway line.

Right now we live in a 1700sf bungalow in the country, 600sf apartment would be a shock with 2 almost 100lb dogs.

 

[guvner]

I know financially we cannot do it, but its getting my wife on board with this. I've made it clear that staying here is best for us money wise, but she just cannot seem to accept it, maybe it will just take more time until she understands??

 

[Long Island Mike]

Toronto vs. Kingston...

Guvnor: Interesting dilemma that you have to deal with-I would imagine that Kingston's cost of living is much lower than a major city like Toronto.
You would have to deal with living in a much smaller place and then find a landlord that allows pets.

Is there any possibility in looking to live in the much-closer Ottawa area or back near Montreal-did you leave Quebec over the French/English language problems?

I understand a smaller area like Kingston may not be desirable for some but just weigh your decisions on this carefully.
LI MIKE

 

[afransen]

$45,000 would be really tight. On the other hand, I imagine one with several years experience in HR should be able to get better than that. I think $55k - $60k should not be impossible. I also think that your wife could claim your tuition costs as a tax credit, freeing up some income.

No doubt about it, though--it would come at a significant cost to your standard of living.

 

[guvner]

Guvnor: Interesting dilemma that you have to deal with-I would imagine that Kingston's cost of living is much lower than a major city like Toronto.
You would have to deal with living in a much smaller place and then find a landlord that allows pets.

Is there any possibility in looking to live in the much-closer Ottawa area or back near Montreal-did you leave Quebec over the French/English language problems?

I understand a smaller area like Kingston may not be desirable for some but just weigh your decisions on this carefully.
LI MIKE

I like Ottawa and the cost of living there is very similar to Kingston, but then comes the fact that most jobs there require French which my wife does not have. As for Montreal same thing, no French and as much as I love going to Montreal to visit friends and such I would not want to live there again because of the french/english problem.

 

[GraphicMatt]

We were thinking Yonge near Finch or Sheppard, the top of the subway line.

Right now we live in a 1700sf bungalow in the country, 600sf apartment would be a shock with 2 almost 100lb dogs.

You might be able to eke out something in your price range if you live that far from downtown, but it's going to be a very tight squeeze with the dogs.

But, hey, it might be worth suffering through for a couple of years if it leads to bigger and better things.

 

[whatever]

Have you considered other parts of town, for instance Scarborough? If you got strategic you could find a place closer to your price range that would have both good highway access (for your wife to get to Woodbridge) and reasonable transit service for you to get downtown to school.

If you're open to commuting it really does open things up for you. If you don't mind the thought of taking the GO every day (not a bad way to travel, really) you could even look somewhere like Newmarket

 

[guvner]

We could look at living north of the city and I commute, but I can't say I like the idea of sitting on a train or bus for 1hr each way to school. 30mins for a commute is pretty much my limit.

 

[Hipster Duck]

Well, guvner, sorry to be frank, but something's going to have to give.

Either you downsize your living space to something tiny, you have to work part time jobs or you are going to have to live somewhere far away where you commute for an hour. Those are the realities of living in a large, expensive city. Since the first would involve giving up your dogs, and the second would put a strain on your relationship and your studies, I might suggest that you live in outer suburbia somehwere like, say, Newmarket and commute into town on the GO train. The good thing about this is that sitting on the train allows you to study or read for a good hour each way so that when you come back home. All in all, that's not such a bad deal.

 

[guvner]

I've looked into the costs of living more north of the city and its really no better, I gain on having slightly lower rent costs and car insurance, but I lose on the cost of the Go Train. 2 steps forward, 1 step back.

I understand what you are saying hipster duck, its all about making the right decision that allows the best compromise so that we can live a happy life together. No matter which way I look at it I see moving to the big city being a strain on us, our finances and relationship, I just see too many cons.

Edit: Aurora seems to have a decent cost of living, the Go is about 50mins, I would still need a p/t job to help out though, but it seems more realistic. Richmond Hill as well isn't too bad.

 

[wonderboy416]

I lived in a basement for $750/month alone quite comfortably... if you'd consider going "down under". It was much bigger than $750 would have got me for a downtown apartment (ahem.. shoebox). My income was a little more and I was only supporting myself though. Basements might be an option if you really want to be in the city.